why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend
why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend
(Source: rebbylau)
im laughing so hard
omg
(Source: dingoinnuendo)
“yeah im a lesbian trapped inside a man’s body” the cishet male laughs as he highfives one of his dudebros. suddenly he gives off a look of pure terror and a piercing shriek as his skin is ripped apart, much to the horror of his crew. his skin falls to the floor and a woman is left standing where he once was. “FINALLY” she roars, kicking one of the dudebros in the dick before running into the sunset in search of some hella fine ladies.
HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE
Let’s say it’s 6.15pm and you’re going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You’re really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don’t know if you’ll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself..!!
NOW HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE…
Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness.
However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously.
A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest.
A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.
Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating.
The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can perhaps buy precious time to get themselves to a phone and dial 911.
Rather than sharing another joke please contribute by broadcasting this which can save a person’s life!
Be prepared and become part of the solution. Get your free next-of-kin notification card today. Click here: https://www.InCaseOfEmergencyCard.com/major signal boost
Reblogging cause this could save someone’s life
Well shit, now i have to go all the way back up to reblog it…
Actually, kind of made me feel better about myself
(Source: tic-tac-scented-tree)
(Source: obriens)
(Source: trollexa)
HAVE YOU EVER JUST REALLY WANTED TO KISS SOMEONE BUT YOU CANT
(Source: northbound)
a world where gaydar is not an excuse to be ignorant and stereotype but is instead a laser gun developed by years of gay labor that fires powerful radiation waves at the cishet opponent setting them on fire. flaming homosexuals? more like flaming heterosexuals. the cishets are on fire. this is anarchy.
*Alicia Keys voice* THAT CISHET IS ON FIIIIIIIIRE!
I have always disliked yelling. It tends to leave a bitter taste of what my childhood was like.
(Source: lovef00d)
I have so much respect for artists with incredible talent
(Source: lohrien)